I smell cinnamon rolls

A few months ago, I got a hunch that something was up. Because of some familiar physical symptoms, I took a pregnancy test, and here we are expecting our third baby! This time, I really wanted to surprise Joe and tell him creatively, but it's hard because I also want to just spill it. With Luca, Joe was waiting outside the door and then proceeded to have me take two more tests over two more days to make sure. With Tiz, I believe we were driving home from somewhere. Probably not the best idea I've ever had, since it's usually a shock to hear news like that, and therefore not very safe when behind the steering wheel.

So, I called upon the help of the internet. It was pretty lame, to say the least. I found the same list of 10 ideas posted on several different sites. Slackers. One of the "creative" ideas was to bake some cinnamon rolls and when you're husband conveniently asks, "What's in the oven (as if he couldn't tell by the smell or by going and looking because he has an insane sweet tooth)?", you say, "There's a bun in the oven!" Zing. Except that there would be a pan of cinnamon rolls. So, really that's if you're going to have a dozen babies or something. One site did another take on this and said put a roll in the oven and somehow get your husband to check on it so when he opens it you say the same cheesy line. I guess I could go easy on these people, at least they're trying. Sorry if you have done this idea.... it's really cute, really.

I didn't actually think of much better, but I wasn't about to yell "there's a bun in the oven", so I wrote up a fake blog post and asked Joe to edit it for me. He ended up skipping to the end instead of reading through all of my witty, intelligent build-up (that I know you all enjoy). When he was finished he was surprised and then said, "Are you really going to post that?" At this point, I had not told anyone. Wouldn't that be fun way for family to find out?

I imagine I could have done better if I had cared to wait another day or two or minute for that matter, but I didn't. Better luck next time?

the help

I read this book months ago and it was one that I couldn't put down. I'm a kind of fascinated with African American/Black history and how it's portrayed in novels, especially set in the South. I have read a few Faulkner books that were fascinating, though not always easy to read, but were set during the time of slavery. This book is unique to me. It is set in the 60's and is from the perspective of three women, one white and the other two are black. It shows a relationship I have never heard of or encountered in other reading or cinema in quite the same way- that is, the relationship between "the help" and the family that pays them. Every woman and family was described was different, but really, these women that were hired to care for the children and home became like mothers to the children, but the relationship would inevitably change as the children grew older.

I give the help a thumbs up.

costumes are fun, but candy is funner

This year Joe was able to join us as we politely took candy from the businesses around our neighborhood. I wasn't sure how it would go down, since we skipped nap time, but Luca did wonderfully and Tiz... well, he got his nap in.

Joe, a dragon and a monkey ready to get candy. As you can see, this dragon costume is a few sizes too big for Luca, but Joe's mom had it and he really wanted to be a dragon. Some may also call him a dinosaur, but they would be wrong. We borrowed this monkey costume from a friend, which was nice because it kept him warm too.

Almost everyone who saw Tiz said, "Looks like someone is trick-or-treated out." What they didn't know is he fell asleep by the time we got down the block and was not awake for even our first hit. Which, by the way, was Theo Chocolates.

Thank you Luca for getting so much candy for mommy and daddy and not really eating any yourself. Of course, that wasn't your choice.

Before we took off, my camera started wiggin' out. I believe that's the technical term for it. Does this mean the beginning of the end for the ol' Canon? I hope not. Hang in there little guy, just a few more years until we can afford another camera.

B is for birthday

Yes, I know we are starting November and Luca's birthday was only two days after mine, but sometimes that's just the way the cookie crumbles. So, let me take some time to celebrate my three-year-old. For starters, Luca is awesome. Lately, he'll "read" a whole book to himself out loud. Really, he has just memorized the book from when I've read it to him, but it's fun to hear all the same. He loves to wrestle with his daddy and is learning how to wrestle with Tiz (it's a bit different, as you can imagine). He also loves to play with his cousins and visit Grandma and Papa. Luca has a great sense of humor that is developing more and more. I can tell when he is saying something purposely wrong (like the words to a song) to see if I catch it and when I look over he is grinning. When Tizzy is crying, Luca will get him a toy. Luca is still learning how to respond to other kids when they push him or hit him, but his mommy is learning how to respond to this too. Another thing Luca is learning is how to talk politely the first time. For instance, when he wants my attention: "Mom, look at this! Mommy! Mommy!....pause.... Excuse me mommy, will you look at this?"

It is a great blessing to be Luca's mom.

At first, this photo shoot wasn't looking very promising.

It quickly took a turn for the better. This birthday crown is a card from Grandma Becky. Luca liked enough for me to snap a few pictures, then it was off. Oh well, it's his party, he can wear what he wants too.

The chocolate whip cream didn't turn out as dark as I hoped, but it was yummy. Luca liked this digger more than the huge digger we got him for his gift that you can take apart with a toy screwdriver. No biggie, it was only four times as much as this cake topper!

A real good party will involve whip cream and cake being shoveled by a digger. Obviously.

28-years-young

That's right people, I'm all growns up!

What do you say about twenty-eight? It's not sooo bad. More and more often I can start a statement with, "About ten years ago...", which is weird because I'm not talking about my childhood when I say that.

Here's what I'm going to do, I'm going to embrace this year. So what if thirty is hiding behind the door waiting to jump out at me? I'm TWENTY-EIGHT! Say it loud and proud, or write it in caps if you must, but cry on my pillow, no sir-ey. Sure this seems like a time where I would say, "And what have you accomplished, Gigi?" and begin a series of punches from past should-of's. Well, not this time people! I am choosing to not dwell on what I haven't done, or what I need to get started on if I'm going to "get anywhere in life". You know what? Where I'm at is fine.

So take that imaginary taunting individual.

Here are some pictures from my birthday walk.

Luca reading about the dinosaurs... again. Nice after-nap-hair dude.

I could've taken pictures here all day. I like the distorted, fish-eye reflection.

Last day of summer and fall is already creeping through the leaves.

Tiz is not amused. Probably because he's stuck in the stroller because I'm not confident enough that I can prevent both him and Luca from ending up in the canal if they are both given the freedom to roam around.

The canal.

Good job walking the whole time kid.

A blurry picture of my new hair cut, for all my girlfriends out there who care about such things. (You know I always do.) I don't think I look a day over 27.5, but I flatter myself.

It should be noted that despite the fact that Joe had to work all day and didn't get home until 10pm, he still woke up early enough to make me hashbrowns and bacon before he left. He knows exactly what I like. I managed to fit that bacon into my lunch too, which kind of made me want a salad for dinner, but since we are lacking produce at the moment, I had to settle for pasta. Other treats he got me for my special day: a pack of three organic mint lip balms(I'm a sucker for lip balm yet I lose it all the time), dark chocolate (which shows how I've changed because about ten years ago, I would've said milk chocolate was my favorite), and beef jerky (because I love me some beef jerky, but never buy it). All in all, a good day.

Now on to Luca's birthday tomorrow!

i love my mom

I usually don't really acknowledge the day that my mom died (September 4th). I don't know, for some reason the date doesn't really matter to me, though it is close to my birthday. [Warning reminiscing: Talk about an awkward 12th birthday, by the way. Not only was I in seventh grade, the height of awkwardness some may argue, but I decided, for some reason (probably peer pressure) to have a boy/girl party. It was lame... until the boys left. Why is it impossible to talk comfortably to the opposite gender at that age?] I did think of her yesterday though, and for some reason feel like writing about her a bit now.

This is my mom looking dope. You can't make your hair exactly like that, you're born with hair like that. Ask my little brother, Alan, who obtained all that curl and kink and then some.

I don't even know what to write. My details of my mom's life and life with my mom in it are all a bit hazy, with holes here and there. In fact, when I get to talking with my older siblings about her or my dad, I usually learn something new, which I love and cling to a bit because I have so few memories left. Sadly, I think I repressed my feelings of grief for so long and tried not to think about the pain of losing her that I didn't really let myself remember her.

My mom and dad in the bleachers watching one of our zillion sporting events.

You know what, I love my dad too. I've been kind of hard on my dad in the past. Maybe not to his face, but in my heart. Forgive me, Dad.

CHEESE! Yes, that cheese-ball is me. I'm doing the classic, smile-so-big-you-can't-even-open-your-eyes thing. Sorry to my brothers whose permission I did not get to post this, but they look pretty cute, don't they?

Now this is my mom, surrounded by kids. Usually it was my little brothers. I love that we're all smiling. We love our mom.

I recently was at a barbecue and it came up that my mom had died when I was younger. This isn't too abnormal because people ask about your family and what not and I've learned it's best to be honest and not hide the fact that she is dead (also known as lie about it) because it only makes it more awkward for everyone when I end up having to mention it. Anyway, back to the barbecue, what was different about this conversation was the woman asked me very politely with sincerity, something to the effect of, "So what was that like for you?" or "How did that effect you?" Hmmm... this is not the typical follow-up. I appreciated the thoughtfulness though and tried to give a thoughtful answer. I talked about how my family really didn't talk about it much and it wasn't until after I got married that I realized I needed to pursue healing in that part of my life. How I realized that grief was not something I go through then it's over, but that it can come and go in cycles. That it was okay to let go of that pit of pain even though it felt like I was losing a part of myself. That just because I didn't feel that pain constantly didn't mean that I didn't love my mom. That just because I had forgotten things about her, like the sound of her voice and the soothing comfort of her touch, I didn't have to carry guilt and anger over it. And that by confronting my deeper thoughts and emotions, despite it being extremely difficult, has allowed me to have deeper, more meaningful relationships with other people.

Okay, I didn't say all that, but I did say some of it. Mainly, I said, and want to say, that it is only because of Jesus Christ working in my heart that I am able to talk about my mom without crying and enjoy remembering her, rather than focus on the heartache. It is because of Him pursuing me, that I have peace and am not sinking in the miry pit of hopelessness and despair. He accomplished a great work in me and, despite my fighting, continues to pursue my heart, knowing that when I am able to give it entirely to him I will be truly free and be able to live the life that is true life. "As for me, to live is Christ and to die is gain."

talkin' 'bout a heat wave

I meant to finish this post a month or so ago. I'm only posting it now because there are some rad pictures of the boys and after talking with a good friend last night, I want my long-distance friends and family to see the boys a bit more. You may know or remember that we had a heat wave (or three or four) this summer. One was particularly hot and the weathermen (and weather-women) were nearly giggling with excitement because precious records were broken. It was the best present God could give them because it also meant more air time.

Here is how we keep cool in the city.

We started with a bucket of water and some splashing.

Daddy and Uncle Steve did some pretty sweet chalk dinosaurs, but they lose when it gets this hot. Little bit of information for you, chalk may seem harmless when it's dry. Sure, you can just pat if off, right? Right. But get that stuff wet and you got yourself some pink sharks.

The next day we moved on to a larger bucket. Luca wanted to imitate a Japanese bathtub, which made it hard to share the water. How can I blame him though, I would've done the same thing but "Mommy can't go in. Mommy is too big. Only little guys."

So, I let this "little guy" try it out.

Then we called in a favor with Grandma and spent a few hours at her friends' house on the lake. I believe I spent 10minutes out of the water. (What would I tell you now, Gigi-at-the-lake? Don't forget to put the sunscreen on your back too!!! I should have taken a picture of the contrast that was burnt back/regular back because it was wicked bad, but that's a little too much information. Just imagine something really, really dark next to something pretty much white. Shocking, isn't it?)

Luca probably spent 5minutes out of the water. Good thing that sunscreen stuck.

Don't worry you worry-warts, we had the shade over him. We just moved it for the photo. And no, he wasn't in there all day... it was like... I don't know, not that long, okay?

My brother bought this container because all the little pools were sold out. Yeah, all the fans and all the anythings that keep you cool were sold out in most of western Washington. This worked out well though we thought. The boys sure liked it. Thanks Uncle Steve.

And that's how you survive a record-setting heat wave in the concrete jungle.